Directionally Handicapped!

"Right a left a ma?" asked the auto driver
Uh oh! Now which is right? Eeeeks.. I was almost hyper ventilating!
"Enna ma.. right-a left-a?"
"umm.. err.. adu.. adu.."I stammered, while the auto driver tried to slow down in a extremely busy Anna street in Thiruvanmiyur. If I didn't come up with the right way soon, we were going to be hit, either physically or verbally. Twenty pairs of eyes were trained on the auto, framing the choicest abuses in the worst possible way, while the auto-driver himself was glaring at me, a little baffled. He might be thinking what happened to me, since I looked perfectly normal when I got into it. Little does he know my problem! Sigh!
Tension rising every minute, I quickly kept the bags in the auto seat, and took out my hands, identified the right, right hand and pointed to the driver.
"Idu anna. Right" Phewwwwwww! At last!

Yeah.. that is me! I'm the most directionally handicapped person you can ever meet in your lifetime. (Pray to god, he never produces any more specimens like me, even after your lifetime). I've always found it difficult to point out right / left when someone asks me. I have to use my hands all the time. I take out my hands, look at them, mentally figure out the one used mostly, the right one, then take the other one, which obviously has to the left one,(How lucky, we have only two hands!!) and then point out to the person who asked me the fated question, only to find them in a half-slumber already. So I simply wake them up, and tell them the right way. :D
Thats why I call myself directionally handicapped, coz without my hands I'm lost! :P

Now, not only this. I have another problem. I cannot remember any routes, even if I've been through that route 100 times. Say, even if it is a simple, straight, then this way and that way and again this way(Oops, I was again using my hands to point out.. Wait, till I figure out which way...2 mins later.. yeah, so where we we..) So even if it is a simple straight, then right, and left and again right, I need to ask at least three people, keep track of their hands, and memorize the way they move pointing directions, to find my way there. It is such a sorry state of affairs, that my friends know I can get lost soon. :|


I'll tell you one such incident that happened. I and my friend were off to Ega theatre to watch 'Jab we met' and were on our way back at around 9 or so in the night. Now we had to reach our hostel before 10, else had to be ready to face a 2-hr long torture from our hostel-owner who was always on the lookout to murder people with his supposedly 'intelligent lectures'. (Rumour was that he used to be a favorite of the torture chamber wardens in some unknown country until he killed one of their own with his favorite topic.. Brrr. Scary na! I know!)So coming back to the story, we were trying hard to find our way through the traffic and reach on time. Suddenly my friend remembered another way (she still says it is the same route we used while going to the theatre, though I'm not so sure), and we raced towards it. We reached a junction pretty soon, and my friend asked me, which way we had to take now. (Blunder! I tell ya, the worst she could make.. err.. she knows that now though). In the hurry and tension, I blurted out something, and she took it for 'Right'. She again asked me if she was sure, and I was!! I was soo sure it was 'Right'. But after a few more turns, at around 9.40, we were back at the same junction. And then we realized, we were wrong. (I was obviously wrong, and she was wrong, coz she trusted me with such an important info :P). Now, this time she took the decision, and in no time, we reached another junction, and then she said.'From here only, we took right, not that one. Guess, you were confused"
To which I replied. "Oh.. so this is not the same one? It is another junction?"
Her eyes popped out to such a worst extent, that I had already trained my glasses to check the roads if they had popped out of the eyeballs. Recovering from the shock, she raced to our hostel, and we reached in record time, barely missing the torture chamber. Pheww!

And after that day, never has anyone trusted me to know any way or any direction.
I'm pretty sure this is no silly thing, and is a very rare disease that only the best minds get, but still my friends do not seem to believe me. So, this is my request to you all, if you find any information about this disease, please feel free to contact me.

Note: Nami you are a dudette! :D :D